15 More Life Hacks

Life hacks are defined by urban dictionary as;

A tool or technique that makes some aspect of one’s life easier or more efficient.

We meet again. The lazy inner girl in me and the outside world expectations. I thought we would just note some of the hacks that I have discovered.

  1. When doing laundry just put all t-shirts on coat hangers. You won’t have to fold them after and they will not crease.
  2. Put all your important items next to the door. I put my wallet, keys, phone and diary so I can pick them up and go and it makes me double-check I have them.
  3. If you are the first one up in the morning then put toast in the toaster and coffee in a cup. Then you can just put the toast down and turn the kettle on.
  4. Use a tick tack box to keep all of your bobby pins in one place.
  5. Extra plunger coffee?? Put it into an ice-cube tray and freeze. Top with milk when you want a cold coffee.
  6. Give someone a plant as a gift. If they do not water it you can call them a savage killer.
  7. Think push ups are too easy? Slow them down so that it takes 4 seconds to go down and 4 seconds to come up. Then tell me they are too hard. Strong is the new sexy.
  8. Moving house? Put together a bag of things you will need the first night. Toothbrush, hair brush, towel, change of clothes, medication, chargers and a speaker so you can jam to tunes.
  9. Make your wardrobe colour coordinated. If you don’t know what is in your wardrobe then you should have a clear out.
  10. DOWNLOAD Sleep Cycle App. You can thank me later when you have only had four hours sleep.
  11. If you are over the age of 14 then you should have a diary. It may be March but it is never too late to start.
  12. Keep a jar inside of your car. Place all loose change in as you find.
  13. Feeling stressed. Place your legs up the wall and lie on your back.
  14. Always check the shoe. For spiders and cockroaches. (Thanks Kerryanne)
  15. Get Uber. Public transport is never sweeter.

There are more life hacks to be found, for guys https://hiddenunderthecovers.wordpress.com/2015/03/09/10-guy-hacks/ and for girls https://hiddenunderthecovers.wordpress.com/2015/02/13/10-girl-hacks-you-need-to-know/.

I will keep looking for new hacks for you lovely creatures! Keep your eyes peeled for sneaky blog posts…there may be one below.



Hacks for Home Sickness

Its not something I guess your parents prepare you for. When they raised you they never thoughts you would fly the nest. But alas you are now many miles away doing what ever brought you there when suddenly it occurred to you that your home sick.

It was in my first year at university when I fell sick and I was curled up in my single bed when I began to realise that all I wanted was my mum to walk in through the door and hand me marmite toast and some pain relief, to call my work and tell them I won’t be coming in because I am sick. But nope, I was alone in a tiny room dying of a cold and being a pussy.

Its one thing to be away from your family but its also another thing to be almost trapped in the city you live in. For those who are a long but realistic   drive away or a 30 minute plane ride GO HOME FOR CHRISTMAS.

So you all understand why I am writing this. Seren is sad. I have not been home in 10 months now and still haven’t booked flights. Home sickness is the real deal and when I get home I am going to cuddle the shit out of everyone there.

So some hacks.

  1. Bring a small memento from home. For me its a jar of sand from my local beach.
  2. Cook meals your family makes. A roast, spag bowl, soup. Anything.
  3. Have a photo of your home town or your family and put that up somewhere you see it every day.
  4. Call, Skype, email, message, text, send a falcon. Stay in touch.
  5. Book travel time to go home. (I fucked up there)
  6. When you are home sick don’t shove it away because you become a shit head.
  7. Read your ‘local’ newspaper online.
  8. Catch up with people from your home town.
  9. Eat food from home. (This may or may not be an excuse to eat pics peanut butter.)
  10. Plan for your trip home and all the things you want to do.

Its looking like a $600 trip to get home so if someone want to kindly donate to my sad fund let me know. But on the plus side my stunning sister is coming up next week and I am more than excited to see her. And now that I am no longer at university I will be posting more and I know I say that every single time. But its December and great things are happening from this laptop.



40 Things I Wish I Knew At 17.

Hello 17 year old self.

You naive, open armed, little girl.

Prepare yourself.

  1. Being brave doesn’t always look as it seems. Speaking up and asking for help is brave.
  2. You are strong. You can walk away.
  3. Your family will have your back. Even your dorky dad.
  4. Tea can heal wounds that time can’t.
  5. Laugh, hard.
  6. Kiss that boy, in the photo booth. You will be friends till this day. He’s more nervous than you.
  7. The popular girls do not give a shit. And neither should you. Just wait.
  8. Your boyfriend is not going to marry you. He’s going to marry another girl.
  9. Learn to stand your ground.
  10. Soak up the Nelson summer sun.
  11. Your heart will heal.
  12. You will forgive yourself.
  13. Wear that damn dress with the slit in the leg.
  14. Ruby will only be tiny once.
  15. Lay down on the couch a few more times.
  16. Clear your room out.
  17. Drop the act of being tough.
  18. Tell Mrs. Smith that she is wrong.
  19. Tell Dad that your still his little girl after all of this.
  20. Eat more chocolate.
  21. Leave your job for somewhere else.
  22. Hold your head high. Your not what they say.
  23. Go to the river more.
  24. Do more things that scare you.
  25. This storm will pass.
  26. You will learn that you are someones beautiful.
  27. He was a dick head. He still is 4 years later.
  28. Take a nap.
  29. You got this.
  30. Making long lists of things to do makes your life easier in the future.
  31. Nelson will not change.
  32. This is not the end.
  33. The ball is not that important.
  34. You already have the most amazing friends.
  35. Boys are bloody c**ts.
  36. Your boobs will grow.
  37. Being tall isn’t lame.
  38. Eat what you want.
  39. Wear more sunscreen.
  40. Stop being a little bitch about what you want to say.

If you knew me when I was 17 I was running wild after being set loose from a relationship. I was focused on the next step in my life and all the things I had to do to get there. I was crawling my way of out of depression and finding out who I was as a person. Looking back I laugh and cringe at what I was like when I was 17. Just between you and I I still cringe at myself cause I am a weird person. I have just over two weeks to create a piece for choreography, find a new house to live, finish university, sort out my summer plan and survive the next 4 weeks without dying. Anyho, its FRIDAY. I have so much s**t to do. K. Bye.

What is it like to have a sassy personality?

So I am writing this as I wait for my tan to dry. Its August and Im a pale bitch who needs some sun kissed skin. Now it occurred to me that my Q&A might not be a roaring success cause all you people (sitting there reading this slumped behind your laptops) know me well enough. Well you curious bastards this is what you get and if you don’t like it well then don’t keep reading.

Your still here aren’t ya?

Well, shall we answer the question about being sassy?



possessing the attitude of someone endowed with an ungodly amount of cool.
Now more often than not I get told that I am so sassy.
That I have a sassy pony tail (what ever that means)
That my jokes are so sassy (I make terrible jokes)
That I approach life with sass (mmmm k.)
Heres a something that really happened. I had a performance review somewhere and they told me I was too sassy. What does that even translate to? As in how do I walk away from this conversation? Is that a good thing or a bad thing? On the scale of sassiness where do I score? 1 being a weak toddler who just wants a cookie to 10 which is a woman in the middle of a fight presenting information from 2 years ago with specific dates and times. Can you please place me on the scale because I am not dealing with this amount of grey.
Now don’t get me wrong having sass is not wrong. Do what you want with the damn word. I would agree I am sassy but of course always in a good way. I sit here now writing a few shades browner and confused about where the hell this bit of writing is going but alas we must continue.
The best quote that I was given to me by a male who thought he would let me know that I have a sexy bum. Conversation went like this.
I was walking through a super market picking up dinner when suddenly la wild man appears (we were in the tea section)
Man: Damn girl.
Seren: Excuse me?
M: You have a sexy bum.
S: Who asked for your opinion?
M: I thought I would give my input.
S: You thought wrong mate.
M: Im not your mate but I can be?
S: How about you just f**k off back to your shopping?
M: Girl, don’t be like that. You ain’t gonna to get a man like that.
*Seren takes a step forward to said man*
S: You need to get off what ever boat your own. F**k back off to the hole you crawled out off.
You are just a disappointment to society.
M: Calm your tits sassy girl.
*Seren now pointing and raising her voice.
S: I swear to god I will ruin you. If you don’t turn around and continue with your poor tea selection.
*Man makes Pssssh noise and turns around*
*See man being escorted out of the supermarket.*
Honestly cat calling isn’t okay. BUT THATS ANOTHER DAY KAAAAAAAY.
I couldn’t explain what it is like to be ‘sassy’ but it is apart of me, I guess. The word will probably die out and something else will come to replace it then I will be that but for now I am a sassy 20 year old. But its empowering to know that people almost fear what will come out of your mouth though your a lady. (Sorry Dad about my language.)
Look be who ever you want. Just be a kind human being. Be proud of you. I mean I can poach an egg now and can adult. My life is working out with a touch of sassiness. So I will flick my pony tail and take my sad jokes with me and be fine. Your welcome. From me. XOXO Gossip Goat.
p.s this place is bloody funny.

A love like this.

I have been asking lately what I should write my blog about and a lovely creature called Renee told me to write about Dance.

Like that thing in my life. That I am studying. Yaaaass that thing. That Big ‘O Topic.

I don’t know why I have never written about dancing. It has shaped every part of my life for the past three years. I guess I find it a very sacred and special topic for me and I don’t want to be shot down for talking about it.

Heres the thing. I love what I do. Honestly. I love it. Heart and soul. Outside skin to heart. All of me. Dancing, its the damn best thing. Now you may be a student who is studying science or law or social studies. Well Done. Good on you. The world needs people like you. The country needs people like you. I am not being rude or nasty but I am thankful you exist. You might be a mother who takes care of her children. Go you, you educated them everyday without knowing and have the best anger management that even money cannot buy. You might be a guy working in retail. Shout out to you. You have a calm exterior and know where everything is.

But I am a Dancer. Yes I am an artist too. I am an advocate. I am more than you could ever think of. What I ask of you is respect. Do what I have been taught to do in this society and to respect me for the job that I DO. I create art. And guess what I BLOODY LOVE IT. 

I am never going to call myself lucky. ‘Lucky to do what I do.’ I am brave. Yes brave. So do not shoot me down.

I work part time in the hospitality sector because study link doesn’t cover my rent or the food I eat. I have work part time for three years. I work part time whilst studying full time. Now the one thing I can tell you is that people like to talk and chat and give an opinion. Often I get asked what I do other than my job and I say ‘study’. This is how the conversation flows.

Customer: So what do you study?

Me: A Bachelor of Dance Studies at the University of Auckland.

C: Oh wow, what sort of dancing do you do?

M: Mostly contemporary.

C: Do you like it?

M: Absolutely. I love it. (Thinks in head, why else would I spend 20,000 on it??) 

C: You look like a dancer. So what do you actually do during the day? 

M: I don’t roll around on the floor all day. Its half practical. 

C: So where can you go with it all??

M: I could get my PhD if I wanted to but the industry needs me so I must go to them. So I might do that later. 

(I then leave to do my part time job which they think will be my full time job because its dance.)

What hurts the most about this conversation is the raised eyebrows when I drop the line of what I do. You know as someone who studies human movement staring into someones eyes with raised eyebrows when they tell you that they are achieving their dream hurts. Remember that.

So why am I writing this? I am here to answer some questions. By giving answers I am hoping to remove the stigmatisms.

Let us begin and dive into this stunning life I have.

What do I study?

  • Contemporary technique (Stage 1,2,3)
  • Kapa Haka and Theory
  • Pacific Dance and Theory
  • Dance Education
  • Dance History and Context
  • Kinesiology and Somatics
  • Dance Choreography (Stage 1,2,3)
  • Dance Writing
  • Dance Interplidiscnary
  • Stretch and Conditioning
  • Community Dance
  • Safe Dance Practice
  • Psychology 109G
  • Anthropology 106G
  • Dance and Technology
  • Professional Practices

I have missed a couple I am sure but these are paper I have taken and/or taking.

Every single paper has a written form to it. Whether it be a 2500 word essay, lesson plans, Pecha Kucha (shout of to Sarah Knox for those little devils), injury prevention plans. I write. We write. A lot. What people don’t understand is that dancers are pretty damn good at referencing. APA STYLE ALL DAY EVERY DAY.

What does a normal week consist of for me?

Well that depends.

First semester is normally pretty easy going.

Monday: 3 Hours. Two papers.    Tuesday: 2 hours. One paper.     Wednesday: 4 Hours, Two papers.       Thursday: 5 Hours. Three Papers.      Friday: 2 Hours. One paper.

16 Contact Hours. 8 Outside Hours.


Second Semester 

Normally the same ish.

16 Contact hours but then theres is this.

Up to 40 hours of dancing. In class, rehearsal, making choreography, in the theater, between classes in corridors because there is not studios.

In second semester my average amount of sleep is 6 hours. 4 hours when we are close to shows.

What do I eat?

Mate. Everything. Different semesters require different diets. First semester is lots of brain food that is slow releasing. Nuts, grains, root veggies. Second semester is carbs. 60% of my diet is carbs. Carbs=Energy. Simple math. No food is the worst torture. Hiss and run away.

Why dance?

I was told by a lovely lady “do what you love, let that be your career.”. It made a lot of sense to me. So I applied to come to Auckland. Where I write to you today.

What’s your back up plan?

Rude to ask. I will always find something to do in this industry. I am apart of a family. Always creating jobs that didn’t exist two years ago. However if I couldn’t do what I loved due to something. Though where there is a will there is a way. I would become a paramedic.

What do you want to do after university? 

Well you might be one of my employers reading this. If so hello. Thank you for being here. And doing what you love too. But I want to create and share. BROAD. But details are for me to know.

What do your parents think of this?

They are incredibly proud. They have always known it would be something creative. They are supportive and since they were the first of their kind (COMPUTERS) I will be the first of my kind to make dance as normal as computers in our everyday lives.

What do you struggle with?

Ignorance. I would like to see you enjoy a world without dance. Without people who make it possible. My own thoughts of being a tall dancer. Always think I am taking way too much room. So I never feel I am dancing to my ‘full’. I am 6ft for your information.


Really I could talk about this all day. I mean I am going to talk about it all life long.

In reality I don’t keep company of those who do not understand what I do.

Its a love like this that is so intoxicating that it cannot be left alone. I keep sipping from this damn cup and I am not going to lie when I say its the best.

If you have any questions about what I do honestly I would love to hear them and help you get some more information. These are my few 1300 words. However this is my passion and career so lets chat and I might even show you a few moves.